Forgetting

The uber-firstborn-almost-Kindergartner smacked her forehead in frustration. “Oh man, I am just always forgetting as soon as I remember!” Me too, I thought. I start walking down the hall, in focused pursuit of something that escapes my mind between the coat closet and the bathroom. I hunt for the cordless phone, only to find, when it is found, that I have forgotten whom I wanted to call. I leave the door of the washing machine open; with things I intend to line dry molding in a wet and abandoned heap. In matters of home, I can be paralyzed by distraction and forgetfulness.

Like Sis, my memory keeps forgetting, and not just the ice cream melting through the grocery bag, abandoned on the countertop by other pressing matters. I find myself is a season of rich blessing. My life and my heart are full to bursting. Sometimes I mistake that fullness for heartburn but even in the frenzied moments, I can see that I stand in the middle of beautiful and wonderful things. But in this season of plenty there is real danger- danger of forgetting that God himself has made provision for everything from the Mac ‘n Cheese to the roof to my very breath. And when I forget, the spaces in my heart and mind reserved for the praise of God are quickly filled with the septic flow of pride and self, churning and emitting gases that cloud my vision and leave me coughing. I fear the admonition of Moses:

When you have eaten and are satisfied, praise the LORD your God for the good land he has given you. Be careful that you do not forget the LORD your God, failing to observe his commands, his laws and his decrees that I am giving you this day. Otherwise, when you eat and are satisfied, when you build fine houses and settle down, and when your herds and flocks grow large and your silver and gold increase and all you have is multiplied, then your heart will become proud and you will forget the LORD your God, who brought you out of Egypt, out of the land of slavery. (Duet. 8:10-14)

And so I praise, publicly raising my hands to tell what God has done, making sure it is clear to my listener and myself, that although these things are my responsibility, only God himself has placed them in my hands and only God himself can make them grow.